Category Archives: Pregnancy
Oh those dreaded teenage years. As a dad you may experience anxious feelings about the coming years when your children will grow up to be young teens. Those temper storms, stubborn behavior, changes in ways of thinking and so many new and difficult situations to deal with. And above all, you know deep within there will come a day when your daughter will start going out with a boy.
Chances are you will struggle with your kid starting to date (especially with a daughter) … but if you freak you will probably make it a lot worse and that’s when crazy stuff can happen. So panic not. Remember your own past years as a teenager and youth.
Your daughter needs to learn from experience, and it is through dating that she will build up skills on negotiation, sharing and receiving. She will experience hurt, joy and shock, which are all necessary for her to grow up as a mature woman and will be useful in making decisions when it comes to finding a suitable life partner. But we are not telling you to be silent and let your daughter do as she wishes. Prepare her for the rocky road of dating. Make your daughter a smart dater.
Maybe your daughter told you about her boyfriend, or you found out from an out side source. Whichever it is, don’t panic! The only thing that would result in you loosing your temper is that you would not be able to maintain a good relationship with your daughter and learn more about the situation. Also understand that your daughter won’t stop her relationship easily, just because you tell her to. Acknowledge the fact that though she is your daughter it doesn’t necessarily mean she is or has to be like you. Just because you didn’t have a boyfriend till you went to college, it doesn’t mean your daughter will too.
Be flexible. Don’t set out rules too strictly as it is only you who will get hurt by getting angry and sad that she betrayed your trust. Give your honest opinion about the guy, but don’t force your daughter to take your side. Express your picture of an ideal guy, his qualities, activities and behaviors. Let her express her views. Leave her to make a decision.
Be tech savvy to find out more details about the guy. Remember that anyone out there, especially teens may have a face book, hi5, or some online community profile. You can find out lot of details about his activities, interests and background and protect your daughter from potential dangers.
Talk about sex. Sex education is not meant to encourage sex, but knowledge is better than leaving your daughter in the dark, which is very dangerous as she can blindly fall in trouble and end up in an irreversible situation such as an unwanted pregnancy or even worse, with a STD.
The more closer you are to your daughter, the more open they will be with you! So face your daughters growing up process with an open mind, and ensure a better relationship with your teenage child.
It can be an anxious time when you and your partner are expecting a new born. But it doesn’t need to be a time for worry, but a time for excitement about what lays before you. If you are like me, you will think that when a women goes into labour you have only mere moments for a crazed dash to the hospital, when in fact you usually have far more time than you think. I think we have been brain washed by watching unrealistic TV programmes about the speedy arrival of newborns. In our case we had at least 3 hours before we really needed to be in at the hospital after my partners water broke and labour began, but playing it safe is not a bad way to be and arriving safely with plenty of time to spare is probably wise. However you need to trust the instincts of your partner, who will know when she must leave for the hospital. The hospital midwives are also a source of great comfort and assurance and are only a phone call away 24 hours a day. So if your not sure what’s going on and if you should be worried, give them a ring and they will provide you with helpful advice.
Before the big day (or early morning) arrives, make sure you or your partner has packed a bag full of goodies for the Hospital, as you will probably be there for some time. There are three categories of stuff you should have:
- Baby clothes, nappies and wraps, baby capsule
- Mom’s clothes (multiple changes suggested)
- Energy drinks (and snacks) for mom
- Good luck charms and distractions for mom (check with her beforehand)
- Stuff for dad to snack on during the many hours waiting
Once labor has started, you will need snacks and drinks close at hand. You can get very hungry being up and awake at crazy hours of the night or morning, waiting on your baby to arrive. Your partner will probably only want water (very cold water) during the labour, and eating is discouraged for moms, luckily she probably wont be thinking about eating anyway during this period.
Having a high level of emotional intelligence in your children is the best way to ensure that they live a happy, successful, and responsible life as an adult. Just in case you’re not quite sure what Emotional intelligence (also often referred to as “EQ”) is all about – here’s a definition from Wikipedia: the ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups. OK so here are ten ways to help your kids attain a high degree of emotional intelligence:
1. Be willing to say “no” to your kids
There’s a lot of stuff out there for kids. And your kids will ask for a lot of it. Saying no will give your kids an opportunity to deal with disappointment and to learn impulse control. To a certain degree, your job as a parent is to allow your kids to be frustrated and to work through it. Kids who always get what they want typically aren’t very happy.
2. Be aware of your parental “hotspots”
Know what your issues are—what makes you come unglued and what’s this really about? Is it not being in control? Not being respected? Underneath these issues lies a fear about something. Get to know what your fear is so you’re less likely to come unglued when you’re with your kids. Knowing your issues doesn’t make them go away, it just makes it easier to plan for and to deal with.
3. Practice and hone your skills at being non-judgmental
Start labeling feelings and avoid name-calling. Say, “he seems angry,” rather than, “what a jerk.” When your kids are whiny or crying, saying things like, “you seem sad,” will always be better than just asking them to stop. Depriving kids of the feelings they’re experiencing will only drive them underground and make them stronger.
4. Start coaching your kids
When kids are beyond the toddler years, you can start coaching them to help them to be more responsible. Instead of “get your hat and gloves,” you can ask, “what do you need to be ready for school?” Constantly telling your kids what to do does not help them to develop confidence and responsibility.
5. Always be willing to be part of the problem
See yourself as having something to do with every problem that comes along. Most problems in families get bigger when parents respond to them in a way that exacerbates the problem. If your child makes a mistake, remember how crucial it is for you to have a calm, reasoned response.
6. Get your kids involved in household duties at an early age
Research suggests that kids who are involved in household chores from an early age tend to be happier and more successful. Why? From an early age, they’re made to feel they are an important part of the family. Kids want to belong and to feel like they’re valuable.
7. Limit your kids access to mass media mania
Young kids need to play, not spend time in front of a screen. To develop creativity and problem-solving skills, allow your kids time to use free play. Much of the mass media market can teach your kids about consumerism, sarcasm, and violence. What your kids learn from you and from free play with others will provide the seeds for future emotional intelligence.
8. Talk about feelings as a family
State your emotional goals as a family. These might be no yelling, no name-calling, be respectful at all times, etc. Families that talk about their goals are more likely to be aware of them and to achieve them. As the parent, you then have to “walk the talk.”
9. See your kids as wonderful
There is no greater way to create emotional intelligence in your child than to see them as wonderful and capable. One law of the universe is, “what you think about expands.” If you see your child and think about them as wonderful, you’ll get a lot of “wonderful.” If you think about your child as a problem, you’ll get a lot of problems.
10. Model emotional intelligence yourself
Yes, your kids are watching very closely. They see how you respond to frustration, they see how resilient you are, and they see whether you’re aware of your own feelings and the feelings of others.
Having a high IQ is nice, but having a high IQ and “EQ” is even better. The modern work environment requires smart people who are also good at building relationships and rapport with clients and peers. So you can help your child be more successful at their job by developing high levels of EQ with them.
Inspired by Mark Brandenburg
Every dad and dad-to-be should know the list of foods mums-to-be should avoid during pregnancy. Here’s a quick summary cheat sheet*:
- Cold deli meats or pâté
- Ready-made salads
- Soft cheeses like brie, ricotta and blue vein
- Sprouted seeds and bean sprouts
- Sushi and especially not raw fish
- Unpasteurized milk
- Raw egg and foods with raw egg like mayonnaise, aioli or tiramisu
- Raw meats
- Ice cream
- Stuffing (chicken / poultry stuffing)
And in general any food that is not fresh and has been sitting on food counters for a while (e.g. pre-prepared sandwiches) or that has been in the fridge for longer than 12h. Also avoid fruit juices sold by the glass (as these are generally unpasteurized) and drinks with lots of stimulants (energy drinks, coffee, tea, etc) or alcohol.
The list has been compiled based on information from the US FDA and Australian (NSW) Food Authority.
The following is a list of common questions we get asked about what foods pregnant women can eat (obviously lots of dads are really worried about making sure their pregnant ladies are well catered for – and so they should ).
- Can pregnant women eat mushrooms?
Yes certain mushrooms are absolutely fine to eat and many have healthy nutrients for pregnant women – more on mushrooms and pregnancy
- What fruits can pregnant women eat?
Almost all fruits and vegetables are good for pregnant women (and plenty of them) – check out the list of foods pregnant women can eat.
- What foods pregnant women should not eat? What foods should pregnant women avoid?
Any food that is not fresh and has been sitting on food counters for a while (e.g. pre-prepared sandwiches), any raw meats and fish and any foods with lots of stimulants (energy drinks, coffee, tea, etc) or alcohol.
- Can pregnant women eat banana? Should pregnant women eat bananas?
Absolutely – bananas are a rich source of Vitamin B and fibre. Check out the list of foods pregnant women can eat.
- Can pregnant women eat lamb?
Yes – as long as it is fresh and cooked well.
- Can pregnant women eat grapefruit?
Yes – grapefruit are a rich source of Vitamin C and fibre. Check out the list of foods pregnant women can eat.
- Can pregnant women eat strawberries
For sure – again another fruit packed with healthy ingredients.
- Can pregnant women eat pineapple? What are the benefits of pineapple for pregnant women?
Woman can eat pineapple during pregnancy no problem – other than the usual benefits of eating fresh fruit (i.e. vitamins) we are not aware of any specific benefits of eating pineapple during pregnancy. Some people mention laxative effects of pineapple (anecdotal information – not research based).
- Asparagus and pregnancy? Can pregnant women eat asparagus?
Yes – asparagus is fine to eat during pregnancy. As a green vegetable it has a lot of minerals and antioxidants as well as anti-inflammatory and detoxing properties.
- Are sunflower seeds safe to eat during pregnancy?
Yes as long as they are fresh and have not been sitting in a bag for years.
- Can pregnant women eat chicken?
Yes – like with all meats (and fish) make sure the Chicken is well cooked and fresh. Don’t keep cooked chicken in the fridge for the next day while you’re pregnant (just to be on the safe side).
- Pears during pregnancy? Are there any benefits of eating pears during pregnancy
Absolutely – pears are perfect during pregnancy although we are not aware of any specific advantages for mums-to-be of eating pears.
- Is okra good for pregnant women?
Yes – no problem with Okra. Another good vegetable to eat and add variety to the pregnancy diet.
- Can pregnant women eat almonds?
Yes – almonds are a good source of iron and fibre during pregnancy.
- Can pregnant women eat oysters? Are steamed/fried oysters good for pregnant women?
The most likely answer is “probably” but many agencies recommend not eating raw / uncooked (or partially cooked) seafood. If in doubt skip the oysters while you’re pregnant.
- Oats for pregnant women?
Yes oats are another perfect food for a pregnant diet – great source of iron, energy and fibre.
- Can pregnant women eat mutton?
Yes – as long as it is fresh and cooked well. Check out the list of foods pregnant women can eat.
- Are dried apricots good for pregnant women?
Absolutely – great energy food for pregnant women. Excellent source of fibre and iron.
- Can pregnant women eat veal?
Yes – as with all meats make sure it’s well cooked.
- Are apples good for pregnant women?
An apple a day … also applies to pregnant women. All good to eat.
- Can pregnant women eat cherries?
Yes – cherries are great during pregnancy (especially if they are fresh and in season).
- Can pregnant women eat beef?
Yes – as with all meats make sure it’s well cooked … especially when BBQing. Steak Tartare is off the menu though (as it’s uncooked).
- Is kale good for pregnant women?
Yes –kale is a great vegetable to eat during pregnancy. It has a lot of minerals and antioxidants. Check out the list of foods pregnant women can eat.
- Can pregnant women eat nuts?
Nuts are fine (as long as they are fresh) and of course as long as you don’t have any allergies to it. Some agencies recommend not eating nuts during pregnancy to avoid any allergic reactions once the baby is born but the scientific evidence is inconclusive.
- What nutrients are good for pregnant women?
The basic food pyramid also applies to pregnant women although most agencies recommend an increased intake of fruit and vegetables (vitamins) as well as increased energy intake to help the baby grow.
- Can pregnant women eat steak?
Yes – as with all meats make sure it’s well cooked … especially when BBQing. Steak Tartare is off the menu though (as it’s uncooked).
- Can pregnant women eat avocado
Absolutely – avocados are one of nature’s super foods. They are high in Omega3 and other rare vegetable fats and vitamins. A great addition to the pregnancy diet.
- Can pregnant women eat peanut butter
Peanut butter is fine during pregnancy as long as you don’t have any allergies to peanuts of course See note about allergies above (can pregnant women eat nuts)
- Can pregnant women eat pomegranate
- Can pregnant women eat pomegranates? Are pomegranate seeds good for pregnant women?
Yes – pomegranates are a great source of vitamins and fibre. We have not come across any restrictions on eating pomegranate seeds during pregnancy.
- Can pregnant women eat walnuts?
Walnuts are fine to eat during pregnancy as long as you don’t have any allergies to nuts. However walnuts should be consumed in moderation (not more than 10 or so at a time) as they can contain traces of cyanide when eaten fresh off the tree.
- Can pregnant women eat eggs?
Yes – cooked eggs are OK to eat for pregnant women. However raw eggs should be avoided (also deserts like Tiramisu which use raw egg) because of the risk of an infection with salmonella.
- Can pregnant women eat hummus? Are chick peas / garbanzo beans good for pregnant women?
Yes –hummus and garbanzo beans / chick peas are a great source of iron for pregnant women.
- Can pregnant women eat spam?
Yes – as long as it’s not past the “best before” date … why anyone would want to eat spam is another question ?
- Is rice good for pregnant women? Brown rice and pregnant women?
Rice is absolutely find during pregnancy and brown rice is even better (great source of iron). However do not reheat rice (ever) because of a risk of food poisoning.
- Can pregnant women eat liver?
This is a controversial topic and some agencies recommend it while others state that liver is not safe to eat during pregnancy. Probably best to check with your MD, midwife or local health care provider.
- Can pregnant women eat oranges?
Absolutely – great source of Vitamin C and fibre.
- Can pregnant women eat pasta?
Pasta is very safe during pregnancy.
- Can pregnant women eat tomatoes?
Yes – tomatoes are fine to eat during pregnancy and provide a great source of Vitamins and lycopene.
- Can pregnant women eat soy?
Yes as long as it’s fresh.
- Can pregnant women eat pink salmon? Is smoked salmon good during pregnancy?
Yes in moderation and as long as it’s fresh and well cooked. Some agencies recommend avoiding smoked salmon during pregnancy because of potential toxins from the smoking process.
- Can pregnant women eat (Swiss) cheese?
Yes all mature cheeses are safe to eat during pregnancy. Most agencies recommend avoiding blue cheeses and all fresh cheeses that are made from unsterilized milk.
- Should pregnant women eat ice cream?
Ice creams purchased from dairies or parlors should be avoided as the is a risk of Listeria or other bacterias is greater than when eating manufactured / wrapped ice cream.
- Can pregnant women eat tuna?
Tuna in moderation as mercury can be found in it, yet is a good source of vitamins / omegas. A couple of serves a week is fine (if in doubt about mercury levels check with your health care provider).
Please note that our responses are based on USDA food guidelines, research based information from Plunket and our own online research – we are not qualified medical doctors so please double check with your health care provider if you are at all unsure about a certain kind of food.
The team at DIYFather.com is proud to have worked on two essential parenting titles for dads: “Dad’s Guide to Pregnancy For Dummies” and “Being a Great Dad For Dummies”.
“Dad’s Guide to Pregnancy For Dummies”
This 170-page book contains the latest information, resources and cheats to help new dads master dadhood. Dad’s Guide to Pregnancy is the closest to a manual for babies you’ll ever get your hands on! It’s also the most compact book on pregnancy info for dads – you can easily read the entire book in less than 2h! From clueless to awesomeness in 2h … it doesn’t get much better than that! The book is available in all high street and online book stores from 1 February 2012 for only $19.95 as paper back and eBook.
“Being a Great Dad For Dummies”
Being a Great Dad For Dummies delivers parenting information in a tried and tested format using short, succinct explanations without the fluff, bullet point lists covering only essential info, icons to help find what you need to know quickly, tells it like it is (warts and all) using down to earth language. As a result Being a Great Dad For Dummies demystifies parenting and helps new dads gain confidence quickly. The book covers pregnancy and the first 5 years of the fatherhood journey as well as specific topics such as: becoming the primary care-giver as a “stay-at-home dad” or dealing with unforeseen challenges such as being a single Dad or nursing a sick child. The book is available in all high street and online book stores for only $29.95 as paper back and eBook.
Moms, sisters, girl friends, partners – these books are the perfect gift for your man! Wouldn’t you want an involved father who knows what he’s doing look after your child? Yeah – well it’s a small gift for dads but a huge gift to mankind! Let’s face it … this book is probably the only credible baby related present you can get away with – so go get one!
A lot of dads are asking us whether pregnant women can eat mushrooms. Based on our research and information from USDA and the Mayo Clinic we believe the mushrooms are safe and beneficial to eat for pregnant women. Mushrooms are rich in B vitamins, which are essential nutrients during pregnancy, antioxidants and iron. The following mushrooms are commonly reported as safe to eat for a pregnant woman (as long as they are sourced from a grower and not picked in the wild):
1. Portobello Mushrooms (Agaricus bisporus)
[one of the 50 foods pregnant women should eat]. Along with lentils, portobello mushrooms serve as a meat replacement for those with strict dietary restrictions or vegetarian or vegan diets. Prevention Magazine lists these hearty fungi as containing 4 grams of protein, 2 grams of fiber, 778.03 milligrams of potassium, and 0.23 milligrams of manganese.
2. White Button Mushrooms (Agaricus bisporus)
According to Agricultural Research Service (ARS) these mushrooms have powerful health building properties that enhance the activity of critical cells in the body’s immune system.
3. Yellow Chanterelle Mushrooms (Cantharellus cibarius)
These yellow mushrooms are generally appreciated for their exquisite taste, color, and texture.
We’ve got a great solution for parents to tackle the slow economic recovery and ongoing financial crisis. Our new Book Baby on a Budget delivers real savings to families. The 130-page book presents the combined wisdom of fathers around the world on how to save thousands of dollars during pregnancy and the first year with a baby. Baby on a Budget is a must have for all parents who want to enjoy their new life with a baby without breaking the bank.
The book covers savings in areas ranging from food, consumables, toys, clothes, childcare and other ‘big ticket items’ for families like going on holidays or purchasing gifts for special occasions. We have done all the hard work to collect money-saving tips, tax breaks and freebies, so you don’t have to. Baby on a Budget presents all the information in an easy-to-read format and provides links to all essential online tools and sites.
To help keep costs down, Baby on a Budget is available as an eBook on our site – download it now!
-Scott, Stefan and Eric
What is a Vasectomy?
Vasectomy is a minor surgical procedure wherein the vasa deferentia of a man are severed, and then tied/sealed in a manner which prevents sperm from entering into the seminal stream (ejaculate).
Is the operation always successful?
Vasectomy is a very effective method of contraception. Overall, 1 in 300 may fail. After you have had two negative sperm counts, the chance of failure drops to 1 in 1000.
Is it reversible?
It is not always possible to reverse a vasectomy. Many factors can affect the success rate of a reversal. On average, 50% of reversals result in a pregnancy. Some men produce antibodies to their own sperm after a vasectomy. This may make pregnancy
less likely after a reversal.
A second option after vasectomy is direct retrieval of sperm from the testicle, then In Vitro Fertilisation to achieve pregnancy.
Another option is to freeze some of your sperm so that they can be used later. If this is something you would like to consider, talk it over with your doctor or vasectomy counsellor before your operation.
What are the possible complications?
* infection is uncommon and is not usually serious
* internal bleeding may cause swelling and pain
* a painful lump may form in the scrotum where the operation was done. The pain usually disappears in a few weeks
* rarely, men may experience intermittent long term scrotal pain.
Are there any long term health risks?
Research shows no association between vasectomy, heart disease, or cancer of the testicles or prostate.
Why choose vasectomy?
* you don’t want any children
* you don’t want any more children
* you have decided that you cannot have any more children because of your mental or physical health, age or income
* vasectomy is a simpler operation than female sterilisation.
Have you considered
* if one of your children died, would you want another?
* if your present relationship ended, would you want to have a child with a new partner?
It is recommended that you discuss sterilisation fully with your partner. This is because you are both affected by the decision.
However, it is not a legal requirement for your partner to give consent. You can choose vasectomy if
* you have no partner
* you have no children.
Condoms help protect against sexually transmissible infections. For more information about Family Planning resources, clinics and health promotion services go to our website, www.familyplanning.org.nz.
This information was kindly provided by Family Planning
|“Being a Great Dad For Dummies” – the new bible for 21st century dads and bestselling parenting book in Australia is now available from Amazon (as paper copy and Kindle eBook) for only $14.82! Packed with loads of resources and tips to help dads master pregnancy and the first 5 years of fatherhood, “Being a Great Dad For Dummies” is the perfect gift for new fathers and an absolute MUST for dads who are already familiar with other “For Dummies” books.|
Being a Great Dad For Dummies delivers parenting information in a tried and tested format:
- short, succinct explanations without the fluff
- bullet point lists covering only essential stuff
- icons to help find what you need to know quickly
- written from a guy’s perspective
- tells it like it is (warts and all) using down to earth language
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