Dealing with stillbirth and losing a baby
“I think as a man you expect, and people expect you, to be strong for your partner … but I don’t remember being strong. I remember crying a lot when I was alone and when I went back to work.”
SANDS (the stillbirth and neonatal death charity) has launched a new support booklet called “Mainly for Fathers” which was written specifically for fathers whose baby has died at or around the time of birth. Dealing with losing a baby is increadibly difficult for any parent but dads are often expected to primarily support their partners during this time rather than spending a lot of time grieving themselves. So Sands has put together a booklet specifically for fathers in this situation to help dads both practically and emotionally in the difficult days and months following the death of their baby.
This much-needed guide covers essential topics such as: the physical and emotional manifestations of grief, telling siblings, family and friends the tragic news, how to create memories of you and your baby and finding support. The booklet also provides practical advice on many important areas such as: how to register a birth or stillbirth, legal rights and financial benefits, returning to work and the reactions of others.
The booklet also includes quotes and stories from dads who helped with creating the content. “Most people tell you, ‘Be strong’ and ‘Don’t cry’. This advice may be well meant but I found it unhelpful. Crying is not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of the love and pride you have for the child who has died.” A dad.
An incredibly useful guide that provides much needed help at a very difficult time – have a look at the SANDS website for more information and to download the booklet.