Greetings! Today I’m sharing an interview with Abel Cheng of www.parentwonder.com on fathering from May 24, 2007:

1. Usually children are closer to mom for some reason. For a dad, how does he overcome this and form a closer bond with a child?
It’s important to understand that Dads get close to kids in their own way. It all depends on how we define “closeness.” Dads form a bond with their kids by doing things with them and sharing experiences. Mothers often are the ones that kids will go to when they have a problem or when they want to share their day, but Dads can be involved in that too. All they need to do is to listen well, not judge too much, and to share some of their life with their kids too.

2. How do we not lose our temper when our kids misbehave? ... read more >>

By Bill

As the parent of a toddler I’m continuously shocked by my misconceptions of what kind of parent I was going to be back when I was yet to have one. It’s something we all go through when we start thinking about kids. I remember seeing a parent lose control once at a retail store and thinking “If that was my kid there would be none of that. No sir! My child will know who the boss is” Which didn’t turn out to be too far from the truth, because let’s face it we both know he’s the boss. I’d visit friends with children and look around in amazement at the warehouse of toys that dared to take over their entire home. Again I’d say, “My child will know the joys of playing outside. Forget video games and personal DVD players. My child will like to read and will be able to carry on an actual conversation without referring to Pokeman or Yugi-o” Two years later Blue and Steve seem to be on an endless hunt for the latest clue and it’s a wonder the wonder pets ever get turned off. ... read more >>

If you're a parent of a toddler, then dealing with temper tantrums or meltdowns are probably a daily occurrence. Young kids who are still learning how to talk and express themselves are easily frustrated. They want something, but they don't know how to say (or get) it. As a result, they resort to screaming, crying, throwing themselves on the floor, whining, pitching a hissy fit, or worse yet, having a complete meltdown.

Getting your kids to listen during these episodes is not an easy task, so it may also be common for you as a parent or caregiver to get frustrated at the same time. As a Dad, I have a particularly hard time dealing with meltdowns. I hate whining, and I would rather ignore bad behavior than validate it with a sympathetic response. Toddlers require a little more patience and understanding though, so I have forced myself to try and help my young son get past these episodes and learn how to express himself more clearly up front. ... read more >>

BALLOONS

You can read all the books, take the advice, put in the hours, be the parent of the year and out of the blue something comes along to challenge everything you think you know about your child and how to handle their temperament. Toddler mood swings, assertions of independence, discovery of the outside world - all that stuff can be handled, it has a certain logic to it. For my 2 and a half year old son James, logic gets it coat and strides off into the night however, where balloons are concerned. Yes, balloons. The merest sight of a fully blown balloon reduces James to heaving sobs, streaming snot and tearful cries of "I want to go home!" He is inconsolable. Soothing whispers, bribery, toughing it out - nothing works.

It started innocently enough at a birthday party we attended around a year ago. Much to my horror a clown had been arranged. I'll come out and say that I'm not a great fan of clowns. The sight of a paunchy middle aged man with a three day beard and a polka dot shirt pulling plastic flowers out of his comedy trousers is not the kind of humour I think children should be subjected to. You don't see The Wiggles resorting to clown tricks to get the laughs. Bob The Builder doesn't have a clown friend. Anyway, back to the birthday party clown. James was quite enjoying the display of water-squirting flowers and disappearing handkerchiefs until the clown started making balloon animals. At the sound of the balloons squeaking and rubbing together poor James lost it completely. No sooner had his face creased in worry, he was at Mach 10 crying and trying to bury his face in my armpit. We had to leave. At the time I put it down to a combination of clown antics and balloon-noise. Incident forgotten. ... read more >>